Monday, June 29, 2009
This week I did not stay up way too late every night. I've been busy sewing purses (website coming soon!) and I did not get so engrossed in my project that I saw at least 2:30 a.m. every night (morning). Last night, I did not turn my light off at 3:29 a.m.
On one of these late nights, I did not realize that I can't type when I'm tired. When searching for "Anne of Green Gables," I did not type Anne of Green Bagels. Since I was tired, I did not spend a few minutes giggling to myself at how stupid I was!
Today I stopped at Taco John's to get a taco while running errands. There was one car ahead of me in the drive thru, so I knew I'd have to wait a couple minutes, but I had no idea it would be 10 minutes before I got my food. The lady in the car ahead of me must not do drive thru too often. I could see her face in her side mirror and she was looking sort of frustrated. Her facial expression told it all. Why is this taking so long? Is anybody working in this place? Does it usually take FOREVER to get service? I was not sitting behind her willing her to move forward, telling her That's not where you order! You have to move up to the speaker! I did not see the light bulb come on FIVE minutes later when she realized she was sitting next to the menu, not the speaker where you order. After all that waiting, I did not hear her order... a medium Pepsi. Are you kidding me? All that waiting for a medium Pepsi???
I had a long-overdue visit with a friend this week. We spent the day talking, playing games, eating grapes (seriously, I'm surprised I didn't get sick!), and playing with her baby girl. After dinner and a movie, it was time to head home. Standing outside, the stars were amazing! Out in the middle of nowhere--with no city lights, house lights, or car headlights--the twinkling was gorgeous. I told Brooke, "I should sleep on the porch tonight. On second thought, maybe not, because the door doesn't lock." Then she said, "Yeah, especially with a bank robber on the loose." (A local bank was robbed the day before and the guy hadn't been found.) I said, "Okay, I'm getting in my car now. Bye." Like I said, I was out in the middle of nowhere. Sitting at the end of the drive way, I locked my doors as my imagination started to go on overdrive. I had put stuff in the back seat of my car, but I didn't see in the far back of my car (okay, so it's not really that far back, because my car is microscopic, but you get the point). I started thinking What if someone--the bank robber--is in the back of my car? He could pop up at any minute and demand unsuspecting me to drive him anywhere. Should I check in the back? Not wanting to actually get out of my car, I absolutely did not drive with the interior light on, until I got to the main road. Once there, I definitely was not near the point of panicking, so I for sure did not put my car in park, recline the seat, crawl in the back, and peek over to make sure there was no one back there. I really don't know what I would have done if I did find someone there, but it never came to that. My heart calmed down and I was able to drive the rest of the way home in relative peace. No, my imagination does not run wild at times.
So, as you can see, this is a great way to get things off your chest and be brutally honest. That previous story is not something I would usually admit to people (well, other than my sisters!) but Not Me! Monday is the perfect place to do such things. Do you have a story that beats that one? I'd love to hear it! Happy Monday!
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
Wow, it's time for Not Me! Monday already. Check out MckMama's blog--she's the very creative, incredibly fun creator of this "therapy" where you can be brutally honest about things you'd otherwise not care to admit.
Let the therapy begin!
Last week, I did not completely neglect to post a Not Me! Monday. Believe me, you would have been bored, because there really was nothing to write about anyway. As opposed to this post... or this one....
Everywhere I look there are signs of summer. Students (and teachers) enjoying vacation, swimsuit-clad beach-goers, sunburned faces, convertibles... Oh, speaking of convertibles... Pulling in to a parking spot at Wal-Mart, I saw a red Mustang convertible. As I gathered my list, I saw a lady walking toward the convertible. Now you must understand that on this beautiful summer day, of course the top was down. As she approached the door and tried the handle, it appeared that the door was locked. My first thought was Your car doesn't have a roof. Why do you need to lock the door? Obviously I must have missed something. Either that or I've never had the need to lock MY car, let alone a convertible. Anyway, as these thought were going through my head, this lady did not open her purse and begin to dig around for her... KEYS! Ummm... couldn't you just reach over the door and hit the lock button? Needless to say, I got a few laughs about this one!
On Wednesday, I did not hit the garage sales. Wow, what great deals I found! I mean, didn't find, because I didn't go to any sales, right? Most of my purchases were not toys. I guess I'm in my second childhood!
This week I absolutely, definitely did not opt to take the flannel sheets off my bed and move on to "normal" sheets. I did not have to make this decision because there is no way on earth that I would have even had flannel sheets on my bed in June. Nope, not me!
Saturday was not the hottest day we've had this summer. I did not see 87 degrees on the thermometer. On such a lovely say, I did not spend a good chunk of the day at school, packing up my stuff. How much did I pack up? You will not see a picture if you click here.
Ever had a moment when you wish you had a camera? Or had the camera but wish you were not sitting at a stoplight, only to see a blog-worthy photo opportunity drive away from you? It seems like everywhere you look, you can see those magnetic ribbons on cars--the ones that started with Support the Troops, but now you can find ribbons for almost anything. I usually ignore them, but for some reason this one caught my eye. I did not do a double take as I read THIS bumper sticker...
Are people really that desperate to find things to stick on their cars?
Well, there you have it... a few things that did not happen this week. Join the fun next Monday! You'll be glad you did!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
For the record, not all the stuff in this truck is mine. The chairs and garbage can are not mine. But, yes, the seven very full and heavy totes, computer, table, two crates, rolling cart, and desk ARE mine... it was a truckful!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Monday, June 8, 2009
As I was cleaning at school this week, I absolutely did not unearth an entire shoebox full of Crayola markers. I actually knew they were there... it's just that my students hadn't used them in a while and they were buried under... yes, you guessed it... another package of markers. One of my students was there doing some work, and he did not completely ridicule me for having so many markers. A few minutes later when I moved to the desk drawer, it was definitely, positively, absolutely not me who found 11 MORE boxes of markers! And in another drawer? 4 more! I would never be the person to have 15 boxes plus a shoebox full of markers. Nope, not me!
I love coloring as much as anyone (as you can imagine from the marker confession!), and sharp crayons are the best, but does a person really need 12 boxes of brand new crayons? To go along with the 15 boxes of markers, I did not run across 12 boxes of crayons, all stacked neatly next to my markers. I now have--I mean don't have--27 boxes of coloring tools. I will not buy any markers or crayons when school starts. Will I?
On my way to a baseball game this week, I decided to stop at Taco Johns and get sopapillas and something to drink. The guy at the window did not ask me, "Any hot or mild sauce today?" Hmmmm. No I think I'll just take the cinnamon and sugar on that. Thanks. I know it's probably habit, but I was crackin' up, I mean not crackin' up, about that one!
Speaking of baseball games, I decided to be supportive and go watch one of my students play baseball on Wednesday night. It was a beautiful night and once I had my sopapillas (minus the hot sauce), I headed for the field. Seeing there was only one game being played, I walked around looking for anyone I knew who would also be at the game. After a few minutes and finding no one, I called to see what time he played. 7:00 PM. Okay, then why did he tell me it was at 5:00? No, I did not show up 2 hours early for the game, and when I checked my calendar (you know, that thing where you write appointments and things you need to remember?), I did not have "5:00" written on the schedule. I am not losing it!
I've always felt sorry for those people who are paid to stand on the side of the road waving a sign, dressed up like a stupid character. Is that really in their job description? I guess if it gets people to come to the store... but still. I wasn't too surprised to see someone waving a sign for Arby's free food on Wednesday. Dressed in a hula skirt and... um... a coconut you-know-what, I guess people's attention was grabbed. But at second glance, I did not see that it was a guy. Even with shorts and a t-shirt on, could they really not find anyone else willing to do that? Maybe they're short on help.
Because I have been sick this week with fever, chills, headaches the size of Alaska, and feeling just plain crummy, I should not have been surprised that I was a little off. On one such morning, I did not get my morning routine mixed up with my going-to-bed routine. Case in point: Open contact case. Check. Pour out old solution. Check. Take contacts out. Ouch! What? That's my eye, not a contact! I did not dump out my solution and contacts into the sink. Thankfully they didn't go down the drain. Pick them up and rinse them off. Check. Put them in my eyes. Check. Enjoy 20/20 vision for the rest of the day... until I took them out! Check.
After reading my sister's comment about this post, there is no way I would have gone back to search for an address on a certain mailbox. And I definitely did not park on the side of the road pretending to talk on my cell phone, waiting for all cars to pass so I could take a picture of this.
This weekend I travelled to southern Minnesota to photograph a friend's wedding. After the rehearsal dinner/picnic, another girl and I travelled 10 miles to a nearby "town" to our motel. Now I've had people act less than professional, but this situation takes the (wedding) cake. Since we arrived "late" at night, we had to ring a buzzer for the attendant to come to the window. And what a sight that was! A scantily-clad older woman straggled to the window. She was not wearing a very short bathrobe (and only that) that wasn't even tied at her waist. She did not have to type with one hand because her other hand was occupied with holding her robe closed! I did not have to step away from the door to stifle a laugh. Thinking It doesn't get much worse than this, we got our key and walked the 15 feet to our room. When I went to wash my face, I was not almost scalded by the hot water. Adding "cold" water didn't help the situation... in fact, I think it got hotter. After letting the "cold" water run for a while, I did not find that it was just as steaming as the "hot" water. We did not stay in a room that had NO cold water... but they did have wi-fi (which I wasn't able to connect to!). You have to love small town America!
Monday, June 1, 2009
First of all, it has not been 2 weeks since I posted a Not Me! But, since last Monday was Memorial Day, I guess it was okay not to post that day. I was not so completely busy last week working on school videos that I didn't have time to do much else last week.
On Wednesday, the last day of preschool this year, we had a family potluck dinner. There were almost 40 people there that night. The previous week, I had asked the students what song they would want to perform for their parents, grandparents, etc. Without blinking an eye, they unanimously chimed in "Bear Hunt." So we set up the chairs and tables... everything was perfect. That night as the kids were performing the song, parents, grandparents, siblings, and friends watched them with smiles on their faces. So far so good. As they "climbed the tree" (AKA Little Tykes picnic table) to look for the bear, I did not see the table buckle under their weight and start to collapse. Yeah, sure, we've done this ALL year long with no problems and the one time their parents are around, they see their children in a dangerous situation--a table collapsing underneath them. Well, no one was hurt and the kids just laughed.
On my last day of school, there is no way I would have let my students goof off most of the day. We already cancelled school for Friday, so how could I in good conscience let them play on Thursday also? Well, it actually was fairly easy! Being the "mean" teacher I am, I did not go to Walmart and buy big bubble wands for my junior and senior high students. After I did not bring them to the Mexican restaurant for lunch (no, I really did not pay), I for sure did not let them "blow away" the afternoon. Nope, not me!
Saturday I was so excited to find some garage sales, since up until now, I've been in school when garage sales are usually happening. I searched the paper, found some potential sales, and headed out. All of the sales were not completely worthless and I was not driving around town for 30 minutes trying to find ONE sale, only to find out it was the wrong address in the ad. How annoying! There was something that did make my time more enjoyable (or at least blogworthy). Coming from a small, yet definitely classy, town, it would never be possible to see a person pushing a shopping cart down the road. That would not be something you could see in our upscale, rural neighborhood.
While the shopping cart was quite hilarious--wait a minute, what shopping cart? I did not say anything about a shopping cart, did I? Anyway, ahem, back to the present story... As I was not saying, the shopping cart was hilarious, but believe it or not, there was something better. During my quest for sales, I absolutely, positively, for sure did not see a road sign labeled "Toilet Town Road." Are you kidding me? A quick double take reassured me that I had read it correctly. Wow, that talk about our upscale, classy town? Well, that just went down the... you know... toilet. No pun intended.